Your date seemed so promising: he’s sweet, funny and seriously sexy. You could feel definite chemistry and there wasn’t a deal breaker in sight. Then, just as you were thinking that he couldn’t be any more perfect, he went in for that all-important first kiss. What you were expecting to be something straight out of a fairytale ended up feeling more like a makeout session with your dog. Disappointing is an understatement. But don’t give up on your sloppy kisser just yet. Read on for how to master dating a guy who’s less than pro at puckering up:
Pin down the problem
Ask yourself what is it about your new beau’s smooching style that’s turning you off. Are his kisses too wet, too dry, too fast, tongue-heavy or too all over the place? (All of the above?) Is he just in desperate need of Scope? Once you figure out what’s bothering you, you can start doing something about it.
Don’t diss his kiss
After you figure out what his skills are lacking, whatever you do, don’t come right out and tell him point blank. No one likes to hear that they’re terrible at anything, especially something as intimate as kissing. All you’ll accomplish by being blunt is hitting him where it hurts: his ego. He’ll be offended, angry, embarrassed and your harsh words may even end up driving him away.
Give playful pointers
Instead of being direct and risk hurting his feelings, take the playful route and keep things sexy when communicating your needs. Try steering him in the right direction by taking the lead and saying something like, I love it when you kiss me really soft and gentle.
If your flirty efforts to improve his moves aren’t working, it could be that he has different needs or is used to meeting someone else’s that don’t match up with your own. In this case, it may be helpful to ask him what he likes, and then you can both work on finding some makeout middle ground.
Practice = perfect
Kissing can be a lot like dancing, you just need to find the right rhythm to stay in sync. If your sloppy smoocher seems utterly hopeless just because he hasn’t ditched his old ways overnight, remember that these things take time. Chances are, eventually, he’ll get it. Be patient, because if you’re really into him and want it to work, then you owe it to yourself (and to him) to hang in there.