It’s an unfortunate fact that how long a woman waits to hit the bedroom with a partner can make or break the relationship. That’s a lot of pressure to resist temptation. On one hand, if you totally hit it off and it feels like you’ve known each other for ages, sex on the first date can feel natural for both of you. If you feel pressured, or have had too much to drink, capping the first date with a sleepover might make it your last. Follow these tips and you’ll be able to getter gauge if you should or not.
Be clear about what you’re looking for.
If you’re both down for a one night stand, or a friends with benefits kind of scenario, be honest about it. It will make things a lot easier for both of you. This way, no one gets hurt and no one gets accused of being immature or soulless. If you’re both looking for the one, and he’s holding open doors and taking you out to a fancy spot for dinner, he’s probably not hoping to bed you that night – courtship is all about building anticipation.
Be honest with yourself about your motives.
Rebound / revenge sex is rarely ever a good idea. If you’ve just had your heart broken and are looking to get freaky with the first dude who comes around, whether it’s for validation or retribution, think before you act. Chances are you’ll end up feeling even worse than you did before. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.
If you think he’s boyfriend material, it’s probably a good idea to wait.
If you can see yourself in a relationship with the guy, best practice is to wait it out for a few dates. Build that solid emotional connection before you get physical, and it will make for a better sex in the long run. But if it happens on the first night, don’t beat yourself up. If there was a serious connection between you and you both felt it, you’ll see each other again.
If you wouldn’t feel comfortable talking about it, don’t do it.
Ask yourself if you would feel embarrassed talking about sex with your date. If you would, you’re not ready to take that step with him. Simple as that. This goes for relationships of all levels. Everyone’s different, and certainly everyone’s relationship with sex is the same way. If you two jive right off the bat and have mutual ideas about respect and know where you’re at, talking about it may feel natural. In which case, getting down on the first date might not be a deal breaker.
If you’re really questioning it, it’s not right.
If you’re wavering back and forth, wondering if he’ll never call you again if you do, or if you two are meant to be, do yourself a favour and just step away. If you’re going stir crazy before you’ve even done it, think how you’re going to feel afterwards waiting for that next text. Spare yourself the torture “ if there’s a shred of doubt in your mind, wait until you’re absolutely sure it’s right.