29 Secrets

Since the premiere of MTV’s latest “reality” travesty, Jersey Shore, audiences around the world have united in embarrassment and disdain; harping the cast, the storyline (?) and the blatant disrespect exuded by each and every character.  (I use “character” because these people can’t actually be real, can they?)

But regardless of the disservice the habitants of Jersey Shore have done to humanity, millions of viewers still tune in to witness the sexism, ignorance and general stupidity that defines these people’s lives (I mean, if anything, it’s a confidence boost, right?).

However, New Jersey lawmakers have recently urged MTV to cancel the show, citing it as “wildly offensive” by “promoting derogatory ethnic stereotypes”.  No kidding.

As pointed out by Perez Hilton (am I losing credibility by quoting the ultimate celebrity blogger?), the latest MTV hit is no more offensive than Teen Mom, The Hills or even Laguna Beach.  The difference?  Unlike characters you can actually somewhat relate to (I use the term “relate to” loosely), Jersey Shore seems to have drafted only caricatures of the worst possible people whose lack of intelligence can only be for shock value and high ratings.  (Right?  RIGHT?!)

The moral of the story?  Yes, the show is offensive, and yes, the people are a disappointment to well, people, everywhere, but these are the folks that will do anything to earn their 15 minutes – I guess we should just be grateful they’re featured on a station that’s becoming increasingly irrelevant as opposed to a credible news source after their loud mouths and brash attitudes undoubtedly land them with assault and harassment charges.

. . . But of course that would only happen if these people were real.  (Because they’re not, right? Right?)

Until the next Whisper...