There is something to be said for being accommodating. However, occasionally some of us fall over onto the other side of the tracks and suddenly find ourselves bending over backwards for the world and wondering why. Are you too nice? Here’s how to tell:
Needs “ yours vs. theirs
This is one of those areas that require give and take. However, how often do you put the needs of others above your own? Ask yourself honestly, are you comfortable asking things of your spouse, friends or even in a work situation? You’re too nice if you can’t remember the last time you stood up and asked for something you need.
Lips are sealed
Say a good friend of yours cancels last minute with a frequency they should be embarrassed to admit to and you, well you, suck it up and tolerate it. You’re too nice. There’s nothing wrong with occasionally putting your foot down to create boundaries of what’s fair to you and what’s not.
You feel like you don’t do enough
Study after study shows women generally fall prey to the ˜need to please’ syndrome. And over the long term, the effects of that are draining. The best way to get around it, experts advise, is to really assess if it’s something you want to do before you say yes. If it is, great. If not, don’t hesitate with a no, thanks.
You don’t have them and even if you say you do, you’re willing to push them back or forward to suit the other person. If that’s the case, you’re too nice. And definitely not doing yourself any favours. People won’t like you less if you hold your ground. Likely the opposite.