I'd say something like "spring is just around the corner!" but both of us know that's a lie and that February may bury us alive in snow avalanches on a daily basis at least.
But look: for a second, let's pretend that spring trends are something we can begin to care about. Let's tell ourselves that, sure, the sidewalks and road are literally caked in salt and slush, but tomorrow — or any day! maybe even today! — we can toss on real, actual shoes, wear a lighter jacket, and maybe not risk hypothermia without no less than 43 layers. Let's, for a second, talk about Mom Jeans.
Now, odds are you've been aware of this look since the days Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Rachel Dratch, and Maya Rudolph made SNL commercial history. Then, you especially became aware of it the higher waists went, the longer butts became, and the more embarrassing flares of the mid-2000s seemed. But this is different. Spring 2015 has upped the ante. What we knew about Mom Jeans before means nothing now.
Let me explain.
Thanks to Topshop, Au Jour Le Jour, and Rodebjer (but especially Topshop), waists are higher, legs are roomier, and we're all now one pair of jeans away from being our best nineties moms. I mean, seriously: the likes of Maison Martin Margiela have all but seen the obliteration of dark denim and "flattering" fits (think of how long we were told to avoid anything baggy), and Gucci has even gone so far as to debut glorified capris (with a tighter hipline, but still). Never has anyone who held onto their parents' old clothes been so validated. And never have I been so jealous if you're one of those people.
Because here's the thing: I'm tired of dressing for other people. I like skinny jeans as much as the next human adult, but I'd also like the option of not wearing skinny jeans and/or adhering to a silhouette dudes will consider acceptable. (Remember how much grief we all got for even wearing high-waisted jeans once upon a time? Just the worst.) And if I'm tired of it, this means other people are tired of it, too. There's also a reason our moms wore the jeans we're now waxing poetic over: they work with everything, and they're super comfortable.
Ultimately, that's what's winning out here: comfort. Also, the option of wearing a crop top without actually showing anything. And: pants that look literally perfect with high tops.
So: would I wear it/them/any of this?
There aren't enough "DUH"s in the world.
I love all types of jeans (a.k.a. I am Michael Scott when he wears jeans to The Office after having them dry-cleaned). But I especially like jeans that uphold the nineties resurgence. We've been picking and choosing the best parts of the decade for more than a few seasons, so it's time to delve in and celebrate some of the less-conventional parts and/or the elements some of us swore never to revist again. (Like, hello: contrary to popular belief, the decade was more than just floral minis and grunge. Let's celebrate the wonder that is everything Laura Dern in Jurassic Park.)
I'm also tired of having to squeeze into skinny pants because the only alternative is bootcut. I hate bootcut. I love skinny pants. But I would also like a happy medium that maintains the high waistedness we're now accustomed to but still offers some sort of reprieve. Maybe I don't care if I look "bigger." Maybe I'm into the extra space. Maybe I want to wear my One Direction crop top with denim Jill Taylor from Home Improvement would love, and be my best teen self. Maybe I bought a Baby G watch just so this would happen.
So yes, I would wear it. I will wear it. I already bought two pairs because I'm not fucking around. At least not about jeans. About other stuff, absolutely. (But never this.)
