It’s time to find out what really went on this season as Chris has narrowed it down to two ladies. This year, they’ve brought back some of the most controversial ladies (not all of them, sadly), including Kelsey, Ashley I., Britt, Ashley S. and Jade.
We took a look back at some of the drama and stirred up some new stuff between the ladies, especially the Britt-Carly drama, which brought Britt straight to tears. Carly had been talking shit about Britt every time the camera was on her and Britt genuinely wanted to know why Carly was so mean to her (she was pretty villainous at times). Britt went up to the hot seat and explained that she really was in love with Chris. The girls started talking over one another (we got lost a couple times). Jillian started losing it on Carly and even Chris Harrison had to rein her ‘roid rage in just a little bit. Carly told Britt she didn’t “wish her ill will,” to which Britt looked like she was going to LOL. Chris Harrison asked Britt point-blank if she would have moved to Arlington and she said absolutely. Carly told a few horrendous stories about Britt and Britt tried to defend her actions and in the end, it just seemed like Carly was a closet mean girl all along.
Next up was Kelsey, the “black widow” as she was called. They rolled through her journey for her next victim “love” and all the stupid-ass things that she said on this season. Sitting in the hot seat, classic Kelsey came out saying she felt “betrayed” and like she’s “grieving all over again” because she was so hurt by everything the other girls had said. When Kelsey asked for a tissue, Chris Harrison handed her his pocket square and with her annoying and fake smile, she accepted in between her crocodile tears. All of her big words were pissing the other ladies (and this writer) off to no end, mostly because she sounded like a pompous snob. Chris Harrison had to tell the other ladies to pipe down a couple times because they (like us) were getting a little ragey at all the bullshit she was spewing. When the other girls finally had the chance, they jumped all over Kelsey, but she played her demure snobby card once more and asked the other girls for their forgiveness for her making mistakes and for them misinterpreting what she said. When she talked about the death of her husband, her minuscule tears (especially compared to Britt, who was an emotional wreck for just losing Chris), she said that she meant her story was amazing because she was able to survive such a huge loss, but she regretted the way it sounded.
Next up was the legacy of crazy eyes, Ashley S. Chris Harrison tried to peel back the layer that is Ashley S. to no avail, but, admittedly, it looked like she was faking it a couple times trying not to crack a smile. Ashley S. explained that this really was her and it was hard not to be silly in the house when the cameras were around, but gave the line of the night when she said, “While everyone else was crying and getting upset, I was picking pomegranates.” Great approach to love, girl! Chris Harrison actually invited her to Bachelor in Paradise this summer, but because she can’t actually focus long enough to respond to a direct question, we didn’t get an actual answer.
Jade was next up and discussed telling Chris about her porn past and how she wasn’t sure what really went wrong between them, since he was initially very supportive of when she told him. Chris was apparently “disturbed” by the fact that Jade was actually really outgoing according to her family as opposed to the shy girl he had gotten to know. While she was crushed it ended, she really just wanted closure for the whole thing.
Chris’ latest jilted lady, Kaitlyn, was next up to talk about her time with Chris and how she really was heartbroken (also, we totally forgot she was the one with the “you can plow the f*ck out of my field” line on the first night). When they rolled through some later video of Chris and Kaitlyn together, she started crying (genuinely, unlike some others), evidently still not over the blow.
And finally, the man of the hour(s): Chris Soules. Britt came up to the couch to sit and confront Chris about their relationship and all the things that were said about her. Already in tears, she said she didn’t blame him for his decision, but she really did feel like she was falling in love with him. Chris said his decision didn’t have a lot to do with Carly, but was based on where their relationship was going… or not going, for that matter. Kaitlyn asked about her notable moment of heartbreak after she let her guard down and after their night in the fantasy suite. Chris explained that he had been falling in love with three different women and it had nothing to do with Kaitlyn being a bad match—Kaitlyn’s argument was that Chris should have pulled her aside as Andi did with him instead of having her go through the rose ceremony. Jade went up next to say her piece to Chris and asked what his real reason was for letting her go, to which he said it was a bit awkward, but he felt like he had been told about a completely different person than he’d gotten to know.
To end the show on a high note, they ran through the blooper reel, including some footage of Chris’ hilarious dolphin laugh and Chris Harrison announced the release of his romance novel to tide fans over until The Bachelorette returns.
Stay tuned for next week’s season finale!
