Ahh jeans shopping. It can be a dream come true or a total nightmare. You might find yourself that perfect pair or you might find yourself crumpling into a ball of despair in the dressing room. No matter who you are or what size or shape you are, shopping for jeans can truly make or break you and I don’t care what anybody says, it’s HARD. But of course, a great pair of jeans are a staple in any woman’s wardrobe so we must learn to grin and bear it. Don’t worry ladies, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Here are 29 things that we know EVERY girl thinks when shopping for jeans.
1. Alright, let’s do this. In and out. Quick and painless.
2. Buy one get one?! Oh shit. This may not be so quick and may not be so painless.
3. Light, medium or dark wash? Ummm, okay how about one of each? But this BOGO sale means I’ll need four pairs. Sigh.
4. Okay, two dark. Dark goes with everything. I’ll just get two different cuts. That’s practical and economical. Look at me adulting and stuff.
5. Why do they make so many different cuts?
6. Which cut will make my ass/thighs/calves look bigger/smaller?
7. Flares haven’t made a comeback yet, have they?
8. Yes, you can start me a dressing room. No, I don’t need help with sizing, thank you very much.
9. This dressing room sure is warm.
10. Either I’m sweating more than I realize or these are wayyyy too small.
11. Okay, maybe I do need help with sizing. Excuse me, can I get these in the next size up? Maybe the next two sizes up?
12. YES! People, we have closure!
13. These damn designers really need to get their shit together on sizing. How am I a 28 in this store but a 24 in the last one?!
14. Sooo these fit my waist well but what’s up with this saggy butt thing that’s happening right now? Ugh, not cute.
15. Sigh, I need to do more squats.
16. Okay, these ones fit. If I never. Want. To. Breathe. Again.
17. These will stretch out, right?
18. Nope nope nope. I want to go home.
19. What’s up with these pockets that aren’t pockets? Why do they do that? Who wants fake pockets? I mean, I never use my pockets BUT STILL.
20. Is that the price or the product code? Holy cannoli! Mmmm, cannoli. No, NO cannoli for you missy! Not if you want these jeans!
21. Hold on, hold on, I think we may be on to something. Oh please, God, let these fit.
22. Okay so…these look…pretty good.
23. Actually…these look…REALLY good.
24. My ASS is FANTASTIC! Thank you God!
25. *twerking in the mirror* Yeah girl, work it, work it. You a fine ass piece of WOMAN, yeah you are.
26. Alright so I could buy these jeans or I could feed a small village. Hmmm, priorities.
27. Well, I mean, I do need a pair of jeans and these are pretty much magical.
28. And you can’t put a price on magical jeans!!! I mean, dat ass tho. Priceless.
29. I’ll take one in every colour, thanks.