What Not to do on a First Date

Worrying about the specifics of a first date can be rough. We obsess about where this new man will take us, what to wear, and the events that may transpire as the night ends. In the midst of worrying about covering the basics, we often neglect to consider the topics that should be avoided while the date is taking place. That is of course, if we ever want that second date…

Leave the topic of Exes alone
When you’re in the initial stage of getting over an ex, setting foot in new territory isn’t always easy. While it’s natural to be reminded of an ex-lover, that still doesn’t give reason to vent to your date about it (unless you are desperately seeking a means of escape – and fast). If not, it’s important to keep the date’s purpose in mind, as there’s a reason you chose to go out with this new gent in the first place. Not to say he’ll turn out to be prince charming, but you do owe the date a fair chance before showering him with reasons why your ex-boyfriend is pathetic and undeserving of your attention. If you don’t, chances are your ex won’t be the only one unworthy of a second chance.

Talking Excessively About Your Girlfriends
First, let’s get one thing straight. For us ladies, our best girlfriends hold the upmost importance in our lives. They get us and we get them, and it’s as simple as that. With that being said, it doesn’t mean a new man in our lives will get them too. While talking about our girlfriends may seem like harmless small talk from afar, the truth is, no guy is interested in hearing elaborate stories about people they’ve never met. Let him learn who you are instead. Just think – how would we feel if a guy went into detail about his buddies getting drunk every weekend? We’d probably be wishing we too had a drink in hand.

Getting Intoxicated
Let’s face it, first dates are daunting, and feeling as if we have no choice but to force conversation can become even more unsettling (yeah, we’ve all been there). Naturally, the easiest way to avoid those awkward silences while pretending to pick at the remnants of our meal is, well, picking up our wine glass instead. While it’s perfectly acceptable to have a casual glass of wine or two during a first date, don’t overindulge – no matter how tempting the case. It’s best to let the night play out naturally, instead of becoming your date’s personal entertainment for the night. If not, you’ll wake up feeling like the date was nothing more than a hazy memory, and you won’t be far off.

Uncontrollable Texting
In order to maintain a social life, it usually means having a smartphone attached to your side. While excessive texting may be acceptable when we’re alone, it’s just plain rude while in the presence of others – not to mention in the company of a new man. Chances are the two of you went on a texting binge before he built up enough courage to ask you out, so he’s aware you’re capable. Not only that, but it’s also disrespectful. Your date will be wondering why you’re not out for dinner with your textie instead, and can you blame him? Even if your girlfriend is dying to know how the date is unfolding, fill her in when it’s actually over. So turn that phone on silent – and turn the volume up on the evening instead.

Discussing Future Plans – Involving Him
As unlikely as it is that you’ll go on about all the plans you’ve crafted that the two of you can do together, even subtle implications can scare a guy right out of the restaurant. Not to say he doesn’t see potential in you, but it’s best to maintain an air of mystery. The first date should tease him to learn more about you, to reel him in slowly if you will; not scare him off because the bait is too strong. Besides, if tables were turned this man would be long gone, no matter how much promise he displayed prior to his confession.

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Tags: first date, new man, new relationship.

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  1. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    oh god i’m such an offender of #2. SUCH AN OFFENDER.
  2. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    oh god i’m such an offender of #2. SUCH AN OFFENDER.

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