Why We Fall Out of Love (and what to do about it)

There’s no better feeling than falling in love and, conversely, there is no worse feeling than falling out of it. Whether it’s from boredom, neglect, or just realizing that what you thought was love was really just infatuation (or lust), sometimes falling out of love in unavoidable. But sometimes there is something you can do to get back that lovin’ feeling. Here is some insight into why we fall out of love, and what to do about it.

Loss of interest in sex or lack of attention
If you fall out of love because your interest in sex is waning, you may be able to spice things up with your guy. Tell him what you want, and encourage him to do the same. Sometimes a little, um, affection is all it takes to get the two of you back on that cloud you so recently fell off. While you can’t regain the mystery and excitement of first falling in love, it can be replaced with something deeper, and ultimately more exciting. If you’re not getting enough attention “ tell him! It may be he thinks you need space, or he may be misinterpreting other signals you are sending. Talk about this issue and see if all it takes is a little prompting to get back on track.

Poor communication
Like lack of attention, there might be a simple fix to this, and all it takes is a head on approach to address why two people fall out of love. If he’s a talker and you’re more private, if you’re expecting him to read your body language and he’s not adept at that, just opening up the lines of communication a little more may be all that’s needed. Take some time to talk things out before assuming you have fallen out of love for good and walking away. Good communications skills can lead to other benefits as well (see above!)

Lack of trust 
If trust has become an issue in the relationship, examine the reason why. If it’s due to a prior experience, whether a cheating ex or a deeper issue like the loss of a parent, this might be something that can be worked through. However, if the lack of trust comes from one of you cheating, falling out of love may be inevitable, as trust is something a relationship needs to thrive.

Wandering eye
If you or your guy is the type to find the grass is always greener on the other side, than falling out of love is not just a possibility, it’s practically a guarantee. This is probably a case where infatuation, as well as that search for the feeling of a new, exciting relationship, was mistaken for the real thing, and now it is time to move on before someone gets hurt.

One final note
If you find yourself falling out of love because you have discovered your guy is abusive, or a drug addict, or has other problems that are unhealthy for both of you,  go with your instincts and walk away from that relationship.

 

Sympatico Image

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Tags: boredom, breakup, couple, Dating, fall out of love, infatuation, losing the spark, Love, lust, neglect, Relationships

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