It’s Not You, It’s Him

It’s almost impossible not to take it personally when your guy doesn’t want sex. I mean, we’re constantly hearing about guys being horn-dogs who are always ready for sex, right? So what’s a girl to do when her guy seems to have lost interest in getting’ busy? For starters, stop blaming yourself because chances are that it’s not you, it’s him.

We hear a lot about low libido in women in the news and magazines, and spam emails about products to boost a woman’s low libido have become almost as common as Viagra spam! But what we aren’t hearing enough about”though there are more and more reports popping up”is low libido in men. As it turns out, there are more men suffering from a loss of interest in sex then there are women. How’s that for news?!

Yes, as it turns out, a guy not wanting sex is becoming more and more common. The reason for this? Well, there are several and most of which have nothing to do with you. Unless there is something going on in the relationship that has led to some sort of resentment, the reasons for low libido in men are usually medical and can include : stress, fatigue, depression, anxiety, low testosterone levels, and even certain medications. So again, for the ladies at the back: It’s NOT you!

It’s easy to assume that he’s not attracted to you or even jump to the conclusion that he’s getting it elsewhere, but the majority of the time this is not the case. Give yourself a little credit and know that of there was something wrong enough in the relationship to put your guy off of sex, then you would know it. A loss of interest in sex isn’t as uncommon as you think and it isn’t hopeless either. Just remember that this is going to be as touchy as subject to him as it is to you, so tread carefully when talking about it and please-oh-please try to refrain from saying anything derogatory or insulting. Crushing his manliness ain’t gonna get you far and playing the pity party and acting insecure like it’s all your fault won’t help matters either. Try to get into his head and see what, if anything is bothering him and if he insists he’s fine emotionally, then find a calm and rational way to bring up the possibilities of something being physically wrong. A visit to the doctor for a checkup with some blood work could be all that’s needed to figure out why he’s lost interest in sex and how to go about getting it back.

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Tags: avoiding sex, he doesn't want sex, low sex drive, low sex drive in men, men and sex, Relationships, sex advice, when a guy doesn't want sex

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Comments

  1. Avatar
    • Watching
    • August 26, 2013
    Reply
    Hi Anonymous. Just wanted to pop in and thank you for taking the time to comment. Glad the piece struck a cord with you. Sorry that you took it as “man-bashing”. Also sorry that you misunderstood quite a bit of the article or at least took it out of context while getting all passionate about the subject matter. It was clearly stated that if there is not some underlying relationship issue or resentment, then chances are that there could be something more going on, with that something being a mental or physical problem. The article doesn’t “bash” men and actually encourages women to not be insensitive biatches when bringing up the lack of sex to their guy. Perhaps a re-read is in order? Or maybe a little more time looking into what’s got your boxers in a twist when it comes to the issue?
    Thanks again for reading. And btw – the writer is actually happily married and not “forever single”.
  2. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Yeah, right, it’s the man who usually loses interest in love-making, “WITH HIS PARTNER”!!!!!Ah, excuse me , but the guy who loses interest , has SHE changed???Ummmm, thought so!!! What a bunch of “man-bashing” drips; no wonder most of you sad-sacks who write this drivel are “forever single”!!!!LOL!! |funny if not so pathetic.
  3. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    I have been dealing with this and am relieved to know that I’m not alone and that maybe it really isn’t something I have done wrong in my marriage. It’s a pain I don’t wish on anybody and thank you for shedding some light. I was losing hope.
  4. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Yeah, right, it’s the man who usually loses interest in love-making, “WITH HIS PARTNER”!!!!!Ah, excuse me , but the guy who loses interest , has SHE changed???Ummmm, thought so!!! What a bunch of “man-bashing” drips; no wonder most of you sad-sacks who write this drivel are “forever single”!!!!LOL!! |funny if not so pathetic.
  5. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    I have been dealing with this and am relieved to know that I’m not alone and that maybe it really isn’t something I have done wrong in my marriage. It’s a pain I don’t wish on anybody and thank you for shedding some light. I was losing hope.
  6. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Thank you for this! It’s such a touchy subject and something I’ve been through and heard other friends complain about too. It’s good to get it out there so women can stop blaming themselves and see they are not alone.
  7. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Thank you, I needed to hear that. I was starting to think I was some crazy sex maniac who wanted it an unrealistic amount!??!
  8. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Thank you for this! It’s such a touchy subject and something I’ve been through and heard other friends complain about too. It’s good to get it out there so women can stop blaming themselves and see they are not alone.
  9. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Thank you, I needed to hear that. I was starting to think I was some crazy sex maniac who wanted it an unrealistic amount!??!

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