Let’s be serious ladies. Sometimes, even when you’ve got the best guy in the world, orgasms can be hard to come by. Do you find yourself wondering why it is so simple when it’s just you and your buzzing buddy in your bed alone at night, but when it’s you and your real-life, living-and-breathing bf the struggle is suddenly real? So why not combine the two and get the best of both worlds?
Great idea right? But how do you actually go about bringing up your buddy into the bedroom?
Up your communication game
Your partner is never ever going to know you’re interested in trying out a vibrator unless you start talking about it. If you already own a vibrator, start mentioning it every now and then (maybe tell him about how you use it to think about him when he’s not around) until he starts to get the hint. If you’re totally vibrator-less thus far, mention your interest in them to gauge his level of comfort.
Be sensitive
This is probably one of the toughest convos you will ever have with your dude. Be sensitive to not only his reservations but also his ego. Ensure that your lack of orgasms aren’t due to anything he is doing or not doing – it is simply a factor of being a woman who has a tough time reaching climax. Offer to give him a little private show of just how good a vibrator can make you feel so he better understands why you’d like to bring it into the bedroom next time.
Level the playing field
Just as you’re telling him all about what you would like to start happening between the sheets, be available and ask him about what he would like to try as well. Making the experimentation a two-way street can help him be more open to trying out the vibrator if he’s also getting to try out something he might have been too afraid to bring up beforehand.
Shop together
Once you’ve broken the ice about a vibrator, hop onto an adult novelty website together to start browsing which vibrators you might be comfortable with as a couple and which are definitely no-go’s for each other. Regardless of whether or not you already have a vibrator, buying your first couples vibrator together can be a great bonding experience and will make the toy feel more personal to both of you.
Be open to rejection
Remember that no matter how much you might really want to try a vibrator in your relationship, your dude might really not be into it. Don’t be upset. Know that the seed has been planted and he might come around to being more open to the idea. Until then, talk to him about what alternate foreplay and sexual measures the two of you could try out that he would be comfortable with to try and up your Big O numbers.
