His holiday behaviour: What it means

The holiday season can be so great: A few days off work, lots of delicious food, getting together with family, partying with friends and colleagues. But depending on how long you and your guy have been together, this time of year can also be a relationship minefield. There is just so much pressure, whether it’s office gatherings, gift buying, potential road trips to someone’s hometown and the meeting of each other’s family (and even crazier extended family) for the first time…

The good news is, where there is pressure, there is also opportunity; The decisions he makes during this festive time of year will make it obvious whether the relationship has longterm potential, or the expiry date of a leftover turkey sandwich.

So instead of spending all your energy dropping hints for Santa about what you’d like to see under the tree, concentrate instead on these holiday relationship clues:

Parties
Naughty: He doesn’t invite you to his office Snow Ball but texts at 1am to see if you’re up for some reindeer games. He has also made plans with his own friends for New Years without even checking your availability. Throw a swanky party of your own instead, with a strict No Scrooges Allowed policy.
Nice: He explains that due to cutbacks ‘plus-ones’ are not invited to his office party, but he is a stellar date at your awkward Holiday luncheon and even pretends to that colleague who wears the light-up tie. Lock this keeper down for New Year’s and be the first one to lay a smooch on him when the clock strikes twelve.

Gifts
Naughty
: The BodyShop gift basket full of coconut-scented soaps and lotions might as well have been anthrax, considering your severe allergies. He has seen you use your epi-pen, and was with you at the Mexican all-inclusive where you had to avoid pina coladas all week. Whose idea of a fun new year includes anaphylactic shock? Lump of coal for this careless kris-kringle.
Nice: An iPod shuffle in your favourite colour, fully loaded with the latest Ke$ha, Katy Perry, Rihanna and even Mariah’s new Christmas album – all music that he can’t stand, but knows that you love. This guy pays attention and went out of his way to personalize your gift. This angel is definitely worthy of a little extra action under the mistletoe!

Family
Naughty:
He claims that because your families have different holiday traditions, it’s just easier to spend the holidays apart and ‘keep it simple’. Clearly your guy wants to keep his worlds separate, and doesn’t like the complications a relationship brings. Better to know now! Someone that close-minded would never have appreciated your family’s traditions either; That’s one less pair of wacky matching jammies for your mom to buy.
Nice:
Although he does invite you, flying out to meet his parents is not in your budget this year. So instead he arranges introductions via Skype. Awkwardness averted, but his level of commitment is as solid as your grandma’s fruitcake, and just as sweet.

They say couples break up most often during the holidays. What is your best (or worst!) holiday-related relationship story?

Sympatico Image

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Tags: Christmas, committment, culture, family, flight, friends, fruitcake, gifts, his parents, Holidays, meet the parents, office party, parties, relationship minefield, roadtrip, Santa, Shannon Christie, Skype, turkey

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Comments

  1. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Maybe I’m the crazy here, but ever since we were dating we spent Christmas apart (it’s his mother’s birthday, and I REFUSE to miss out on dysfunctional family time!). He’s welcome to join my gang of crazies for xmas, but I certainly cannot handle his!
  2. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    Maybe I’m the crazy here, but ever since we were dating we spent Christmas apart (it’s his mother’s birthday, and I REFUSE to miss out on dysfunctional family time!). He’s welcome to join my gang of crazies for xmas, but I certainly cannot handle his!
  3. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    OMG i thought I was the only one whose family wears matching pj’s on xmas! Scary or what.
  4. Avatar
    • Sarah Robinson
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    “… if you’re up for some reindeer games.” HahahaAwesome article!
  5. Avatar
    • Anonymous
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    OMG i thought I was the only one whose family wears matching pj’s on xmas! Scary or what.
  6. Avatar
    • Sarah Robinson
    • January 1, 1970
    Reply
    “… if you’re up for some reindeer games.” HahahaAwesome article!

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