The Dos and Don’ts of Setting People Up

Ah, spring! Warm weather! Sunshine! The glorious sensation of leaving the office while the sun is still above the horizon. But spring is about more than relief from Seasonal Affective Disorder and the need for a daily dose of Vitamin D supplements. It’s also the start of Dating Season, when people begin to shed their winter weight and evaluate each person they cross for dating potential. And while it’s a challenge to make your own dating decisions, hardly anyone wavers in their confidence as a matchmaker.

A foolish thing, given that setting people up is a true science. Yes, a science. And from what I remember learning in high school, science has a few rules:

1. Common Ground

The basis for every healthy relationship is having some key things in common. Besides the fact that you know and like each of them. But not too much common ground. As magical as it sounds to think that you have a romantically-inclined carbon copy somewhere out there, you never really want to date yourself, even if you happen to be really awesome. Look to match up two people who have enough in common to get along, but enough differences to find each other interesting.

2. Mystery

While it’s natural to want to do a hard-sell on why they would each benefit from letting you arrange a blind date, resist the urge to provide them each with an unauthorized biography of their potential love match. Let their curiosity unfold the old-fashioned way, by making them Google each other. 

3. Room for error

Look, sometimes things don’t work out. In the case that the sparks you imagined are more like the dying embers of a stamped-out cigarette in the gutter, you need to remain a neutral party. That is, unless one of them is clearly at fault, in which case you just blame them.

4. Credit

The most wonderful part of match making is successfully making a match. Just ask your meddling Grandmother, when it does work out, you can take credit for the duration of the relationship and/or request to be the officiant at their wedding.



Tags: dating potential, dating season, dating., matchmaker, spring, sunshine, warm weather, winter weight

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