Vinny, Stop Messing With Us

Unless you’re new to Bachelor Nation (if so, welcome), you probably know what’s been going on with Vinny. To recap: he was on JoJo’s season of The Bachelorette, got sent home and then resurfaced in the third season of Bachelor in Paradise, which we’re now about halfway through.

On basically the first night, Vinny and Izzy (from Ben’s season, though none of us can actually recall seeing her), paired up and were inseparable until this past week, when she wanted to see where things went with newcomer (and fellow “who?” castmate), Brett. Naturally, when you’re in a relationship and one person suggests that they might want to try dating someone else, even though they’ve been getting snuggly with you for the past two weeks (which is a lifetime in Bachelor time), you break up, because drama is the building blocks of every great reality TV show. Vinny went on his way, but in such a quiet Vinny-like way that we spent the rest of the week scouring his Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat for clues as to whether he’d be back.

And, well, he totally baited us, too.

On Wednesday, the barber and DJ hinted at some big news coming our way. And because we’re basically obsessed with him (and not just his face, though he is by far one of the sexiest guys we’ve seen on the franchise in a long time), we waited and refreshed our feeds for hours. And then waited and refreshed some more.

Finally, he made his “big announcement,” that he is now available to DJ your wedding, which is annoying AF to me because I just got married like a month ago and this would have been better news to me then.

But wait, there’s more!

Even though his and Izzy’s breakup was one of the most heartbreaking things to watch in the world (Vinny crying = everyone crying), apparently they might be back together. According to TMZ, the two were spotted snuggling on a flight from New York to LA and not being at all discreet about it. The two chalked it up to being close friends and all that bullshit, but after there have been sightings of both Josh and Amanda and Grant and Lace together, we’re not convinced this is a “just friends” situation. Because Paradise is what you make it, right?

So, bottom line, Vinny, we love you and we want you to be happy, but can you, for one second, please stop messing with us? Reserve your use of the diamond ring emoji for when there’s actual engagement news to be announced because we basically follow your every move and it’s very, very stressful to keep refreshing your twitter for like three hours straight. Plus, my phone died in the process. Kthanks.

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