Week three, night two and we’re all in tears. SO MANY TEARS.
1. The frontrunners, the ones to get engaged, the ones to take inspiration from, Vinny and Izzy (#TeamVizzy), officially ended their Paradise relationship, which resulted in Vinny going home. Vinny cried. Izzy cried. We all cried. It sucked to watch.
2. Because this show is hellbent on showing us that happy relationships are possible, they brought back Janner (Jade and Tanner), who ended the last season of Bachelor in Paradise engaged and eventually married (on TV, obvs). The two came in to Playa Escondida to give the crew (and remaining few couples) a love-filled pep talk of what can “be real” and a date card to the couple who they think are deserving of one, of course.
3. While Janner talked to all the peeps in Paradise, some spent their time talking about how great their relationship is while Ashley talked about how annoyed she is with the whole Caila and Jared relationship instead of getting some concrete relationship advice or being “open-minded” like she said she was going to be (she’s exhausting). Of course, “her worse nightmare imagined” came true when Janner sent Caila and Jared (Cared? Jaila?) on the date where they “fell in love.”
4. Evan and Carly went on a date because they’re like a couple now and it still doesn’t make sense. They were a part of some ritual and expressed their feelings (which obviously Evan had PLENTY). Carly said things like “my lady boner is back” and it made everyone very, very uncomfortable.
5. Ashley decided she’d had enough of the Jaila pairing (can we make this happen?) and tried to get into Jared’s head (which totally worked because Jared is hella manipulative). He asked Caila if her feelings were honourable and she automatically knew that Ashley was behind everything. (Tired yet? ME TOO.) Caila confronted Ashley and it naturally went around in circles because Ashley makes NO SENSE AT ALL. Ugh.