If you’re looking to lose faith in humanity, venture no further: after quitting Twitter in the wake of a, um, “scandalous” photo endeavour, Miley Cyrus has returned to the social media universe because of a certain Charlie Sheen. (Worst.)
The 18-year-old premiered her new 140-character persona by saying “do not fear, the Sheenius is here!” then elaborated on her return by explaining, “I’m not gonna lie. I came back to Twitter for two reasons. My fans and to follow Charlie Sheen”.
Cue: over-the-top eye roll. …Now.
But of course, it gets better. After concluding Monday’s “unforgettable” (read: infamous) live show, the artist-formerly-known-as-employable responded with “Dear Miley, Welcome back to Twitter! Always felt you were epic! Now you proved it! Thanks for the love”. (And with that, the universe wept.)
Granted, what kind of a story would this be if we left it at that? As high school seniors would have it, a conversation cannot be left at just that, so the former Hannah Montana star responded to Sheen with “I always felt the same about you! You have taught me everything I know about WINNING. Duh!” (But, like, DUH – the “winning” joke was over before Charlie Sheen’s career was.) Cyrus then proceeded to Tweet about cooking dinner, claiming then that the only thing missing was Charlie Sheen himself. (And scene.)
So the real question of the hour remains: will the 18 and 45-year-old form the next greatest celebrity coup . . . no. Friendship?