Some first dates are awesome. The chemistry and conversation is there, and you can’t wait to see this person again. On the other hand, some first dates leave you wishing you could get that couple hours of your life back. The worst though, is when you can’t decide if you really want to venture onto the second date. If you’re iffy on how you feel, give this list a read and see if any of these 5 signs sound familiar. If so, give it a miss and get on to the next.
He talks about his ex. This is a well known first date faux pas for good reason. If he brings up his ex, you can count on it being a recurring theme in your relationship. He’s not over her, which means he’ll probably end up comparing you to her. You don’t want that on your first date, or well into your relationship.
He’s super late. This is one you must use your best judgement on. If you can let it slide this once (he has a completely reasonable excuse or he makes up for it in some other thoughtful way,) then by all means, cut the man some slack. But generally, if a person can’t even appear to have their schedue under control on a first date, it’s a good indicator they probably don’t. The first date is the time to be there with your game face on. Looking presentable, smelling good, on time. These are things you have every right to expect. After all, you took the care to do it.
He brags about money. Probably, this comes from a place of insecurity. If he raves about his bank account or any other material things, he’s trying to distract you from really getting to know who he is. He may very have a great personality, but by bragging, he’s proving to you that he doesn’t believe he’s good enough on his own. You want a man who will make you feel secure with kindness, trust, and compassion, not the promise of material things. Nothing is less permanent than that.
He makes judgemental comments about other people. This is a sure fire indicator he’s not to be trusted. If he says rude or uncalled for things about anyone from his ex to your waitress, you can count on him doing it about you the minute you say or do something he doesn’t like. You don’t want to feel like you have to walk around egg shells to “stay on his good side.” This isn’t at all attractive, romantic, or kind.
He doesn’t ask you any questions. It’s always weird when the general question / answer reciprocation doesn’t happen. No amount of playing it cool, intimidation or insecurity should justify him not asking you any questions. Not only is this a sign of a terrible conversationalist, but also someone who is off in a la la land and only thinking about himself. You should feel that he’s interested in you and wants to get to know you. That’s what dating is all about. If you’re not even invited to the conversation, it’s not going to work.
