If you have ever been on the receiving end of cheating, you know that infidelity can be a devastating and lead to many weeks, months or years of heartbreak. However you view it, the question still looms, why did they cheat? There’s rarely an easy, straightforward answer; most shy away from even asking or wondering, because, frankly, the answer can leave you feeling rattled. But knowledge is power, and when you know, you are better able to see the signs for what they so you steer clear the next time around.
Studies show that people can cheat for several surface type reasons. They do it because they can. The options of meeting people in our current age abound and there is no shortage of opportunities. Those that engage in infidelity based on this reason may not have yet learned or agree to the importance of putting boundaries on their desires or whims. Generally, this has little to do with the other person and more to do with impulse control. The same holds true for those who reason that it adds an element of excitement to their lives.
Some also engage in infidelity when faced with neglect in a relationship. Perhaps they are in a relationship where frankly they aren’t feeling connected or appreciated by the other person. When another comes along and shows the very things they feel are lacking, a perfect storm is brewed.
While these surface reasons tend to be far more common, you do occasionally run into the kind of person who cheats out of pure manipulation of the opposite sex and hindsight shows just how coercive it all was. These are the people that tend to spin elaborate stories, rarely get caught in a lie and are master jugglers. Unfortunately, it’s easy enough to get tangled in the web, but more often then not, their actions don’t match their words. With that in mind, you can steer clear.
Bottom line, when figuring out the why’s around cheating, there’s no black and white answer. As with most things, it falls in the grey space. Give yourself time to process and recover and recognize what type of situation this may have been for you. Then do yourself a favour, move on and accept the eye-opening experience for what it was: a good lesson.