How to Know He’s Not the One

Every girl experiences that moment when she has met The One, even though she may have met more than one of him during her life. However, sometimes you meet a guy that you are on the fence about “ he might be The One or he might just be another one. There are some signs and warnings you can look for when trying to decide whether or not he is The One “ see below for a few examples.

You’ve been together a year and you haven’t met his parents. Or his friends. Or, if he has one or more, his children. This is clearly not a man who wants to share his life (or parts of it) with you, and he is not The One.

All you do is fight. Makeup sex can be awesome, but if all you and your guy are having is makeup sex, he may not be The One. Once you’ve passed through the honeymoon phase, (or maybe while you’re still in it), if you find that you and your guy are constantly fighting over everything, he may not be The One.

Stalker behaviour. At first, this may seem flattering “ he’s always calling, texting, showing up to surprise you at work or the gym. No matter where you go, his smiling face is not far behind. After a bit, however, this may become disturbing. If you come out of a meeting and have five voice messages, two texts and three e-mails from him, he is probably not The One.

He’s constantly late. You have to call him, text him, remind him constantly, even for occasions that are special for him (his mom’s birthday) or parties for which he was the invitee.  This is just disrespectful, and certainly The One will have nothing but respect for you.

He’s permanently unemployed. Unless you have always dreamed that The One would be your boy toy, completely and permanently unemployed, this guy is not him. Almost everyone experiences being laid off or down-sized or whatever, but if your guy is always being let go, or always on the verge of getting a job but it falls through at the last minute, just hovering on the cusp of employment but never reaching it, he is not The One.

He talks about his ex all the time. Or his best friend. Or, yikes, his mother. If you feel you are always being compared and found lacking, or if his actions make you think he would be having a better time if only his ex/friend/mother (ha) were there, he is probably not The One.

He has a drinking/drug/other serious problem. We’re not talking about a guy who goes out on the weekend with his friends for beer. If he has an addiction or other serious issues that need to be addressed, he is not The One. At least not now. If he can get help and recover, than maybe he will be, some day. But don’t commit yourself to him now, thinking you can fix him. He has to fix himself first.

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Tags: is he the one, signs he's not for you, signs he's not the one, signs he's the one for you

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