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Failure to Launch: The Bedroom Edition

What to do when you want to get down, but he’s not ‘up’ for it

Most of us have likely been there “ in the moment “ feeling good “ ready get down, and then um, let’s just say there is a lack of boom. Ugh. It’s always an awkward situation. So how do you talk about it? Your lady friends are always a good go-to for advice “ but here’s a little “she said, he said” to provide insight into your man’s business.

She Said: It’s been a few weeks now and every time we attempt to get our groove on he can’t seem to stay at full attention “ is it because he’s not attracted to me?

He Said: Well, most often, (ahem, I’m NOT speaking from experience), it has very little to do with attraction. It’s more likely his head is caught up in other stresses “money stress, work stress, or even another stress in your relationship, and that is what’s taking away from his ability to¦  Err¦ Perform.  While your first instinct is to take it personally “ I would suggest you don’t. It very likely has NOTHING to do with you.  And if it does, it’s likely to be some other issue in your circumstances/nature of your relationship, and not whether or not he sees you as attractive.

She Said:  So is there a way I can ease into it and not put any pressure on him? Or is does he have to do it on his own?

He Said:  When a guy can’t get it up “ he feels pressure about it. Likely he feels stupid about it.  He probably shouldn’t, but he will.  So any added pressure from the girl could potentially make the whole thing worse.  When the guy is comfortable and the moment is sexual, things should work most of the time.  So give your boy attention, and take the focus off his member stuck at 6pm.  

She Said:  Ok “ if it doesn’t stop and the problem becomes a pink elephant in the bedroom that’s affecting other areas of our relationship “ what’s the best way to approach talking to him about it?

He Said:  Hmm. If things (or his thing) doesn’t come around, then it eventually needs to be discussed.  Again “ perhaps the conversation needs to be about anything or everything that does not have to do with his penis.  Make your focus to uncover the stresses that may be causing the lack of excitement “ and hopefully “ once he has unleashed what’s really bothering him, he will be able to unleash his beast.     

 

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