There are pros and cons to dating a relationship newbie. On the plus side, he’s probably super stoked about you, which will make you feel like a goddess (a welcome feeling in any relationship dynamic), on the con side, you may need to be a little extra assertive in some areas of the relationship, and not just the bedroom. If you’re honest with yourself about why you’re with him, and open with each other about your past, his lack of experience will be no big deal.
Here are 5 tips for dating an inexperienced guy.
Be honest with yourself and him. If you’re dating a less than experienced guy because you’re scared of rejection, the relationship will get boring pretty fast. You’re not doing anyone any favours by giving someone you’re not really into your attention. But if the green guy you’re with happens to be a catch, be open with each other about your past experiences. In all areas of life, that is. You’ll probably find that he has more experience than you in some, and vice versa. Make it a goal to teach each other new things.
Combat insecurities. Instilling confidence in your partner is important in any relationship, but in the case of dating a less than experienced guy, it’s important to keep him feeling like the man in the relationship. Let him do nice things for you, tell him you appreciate him, and be specific in the ways he helps you and the ways you think he’s super hot.
Resist the urge to “mould him.” Dating an inexperienced guy may lure you into thinking you’ll be able to train him. To a certain extent, being influenced by our partners can happen, especially if he has no clue what to do in the bedroom. But if the novelty of dating a relationship / sexual newbie seems like a blank canvas on which you can create your own masterpiece, you’ll run into problems. Allow him to bring to the table what he can. You’ll probably be surprised with what he can offer.
Don’t let your ego get in the way. Never slip into the role of “the experienced one in the relationship.” This dynamic isn’t a loving one. Plus, it puts pressure on you. You won’t be able to have fun together if you constantly feel like a teacher. If he says or does something out of line, don’t just chalk it up to his inexperience, or let it slide with a laugh. Value and consider all of his opinions like you’d want your partner to consider yours.
