You’ve been dating for a while now, and you spend more nights at their place than your own. The day has come when you decide to move in together. Here’s how to handle the stresses of co-habitation.
The actual move can be a very stressful occasion¦there’s so much packing, organizing, and lifting involved. Then there’s the unpacking, organizing, and, well, more lifting. Make sure your move gets off to a good start by making it fun! Ask your friends to help out in exchange for a pizza party, and don’t get too overwhelmed– it will get done! Do as much pre-organization as possible to lessen the stress on the big day. Make a moving mix to lighten the mood when unpacking seems daunting.
After you’ve moved in, you will need to set boundaries for each other. For example, if you want the living room on Wednesdays to do yoga, make sure your partner is aware so they will know to give you your personal space. If they have a routine that they are adamant about (for example, showering every day after work), be sure to respect their time and space. Being able to be alone while living with someone is just as important as knowing how to spend most time together.
It’s most likely that you’ll pick up on little annoyances by your new roomie that you didn’t notice before (ie: leaving the toilet seat up, not replacing the toilet paper roll, leaving dishes around). If it’s something small, pick your battles. However, if you find that your annoyance factor is slowly creeping to boiling point, be upfront about what is bothering you. Do not attack your partner on what’s pissing you off, but let them know if something is bothering you before you go Christian Bale on them. Try using this sentence as a template: I feel _________ when you __________ because it makes me feel__________. Using a personal tone will lessen the feeling of being attacked for their bad habit.
Although it’s important to air your feelings on what’s been bothering you, chances are, you’re not little miss perfect. So keep this in mind when you walk in on impromptu Sunday Night Football at your place and try being flexible. Going with the flow once in a while can work wonders on co-habitation.