I'm going to be honest right now because I feel like we've been through a lot together: I hate summer. I hate it. I hate the heat, I hate the sun, I hate that my hair explodes the minute I'm out of an air-conditioned space, and I hate how for some reason all I want to eat is ice. It's terrible. The way some people get depressed during winter is the way I get depressed when it's still light at 10 p.m. The sunlight? It's not my friend. I drove from my house to Chapters the other afternoon and now have one incredibly tanned arm because I didn't apply my SPF 60. It's like it knows. Summer knows. And if summer and you also have a quiet understanding that you hate each other, this piece is for you. We are going to make this a bearable summer if it kills us — or at the very least, we are going to try all of these things and look at autumn-themed Tumblrs to remind ourselves that Christmas is in about six months.
You vs. humidity
Well I'm not going to lie to you: we're hopeless here. We can buy every humidity-fighting product in the world, but guess what: we're still all going to look like Roseanne Roseannadanna. So we must choose to embrace it; to confront humidity head-on. You want to make our hair big, humidity? Bring it on. The '90s are back, friend, and if puffy, un-ironed/curled hair could rule the school circa The Craft, we can absolutely embrace our own inner teen-somethings and bask in the glory of untamed locks. That, or we can sock bun. All day. All night. All summer long.
Though truthfully, a product-free few months isn't the worst thing for your locks. Spraying a touch of Bumble & B umble's Surf Spray into wet hair and letting it dry (or blow-drying just enough) will actually give you that coveted "beach look" while helping keep your sanity until September. (Then the time is ours'.)
You vs. melting makeup
DON'T YOU HATE THIS? Of course you do. You are reading this because we are one in the same, and you often find yourself retreating to bathrooms caking on powder and cursing your choice to live in a place that isn't either England or the Antarctic. So here's the key: we must wear less. Gone are the days of the three-step (concealor, foundation, powder), and in its place we must opt for the lightest approach. A little concealer, a little powder, eyeliner, mascara, and a lip shade. Done. Night, of course, is a different story (and odds are you'll be somewhere A/C'd — and if not, we'll talk), but if the sun's only going to make you wipe your makeup off with your iced tea can while you weep over memories of cold winter nights and hot drinks, there's no point. You'll save product, you'll save money, you'll save your soul (or at least cries of "WHY!")
You vs. limited clothing options
I mean, seriously, how do people even like summer to begin with? You go from six glorious months of layers and choices to what: another six of three pieces, and the want to peel them off and replace them only with water and leaves. Do you know what F/W collections are previewing now? To give us hope. Well, no. But aren't they a terrific reminder of what will soon be ours? It isn't ours now, though, and in order to help make that rotation between sundresses, shorts, tanks, and t-shirts bearable (nothing can, truly, but we can try), we've got to try the oldest trick in the book: accessories. Necklaces. Bracelets. Shoes we like. Sunglasses. Hats (for the love of all that is good, hats). Tights aren't a currency anymore — and don't get me started on pants. But we can pretend. And we can use accessories to cancel out the pain of humidex warnings and severe thunderstorms. Or at the very least, we can wear accessories while we go on the internet, looking at fall and winter clothes, and counting down around anyone who dares sing the praises of summer. Not in our house. Not in our house at all.