The Best Christmas Diet Ever

With the holidays come the inevitable how-to guides. You know the ones: how to eat gravy without the flavor, how to say no to dessert without being rude, how to eat a vegetarian turkey and lose weight simultaneously “ the rules that make Christmas seem far less like a Festivus and far more like a practice in sorrow and self control. Well today we offer an alternative. Here are the reasons why we think you should eat whatever you want and why you shouldn’t feel bad about it. (We warn you, this isn’t a health article.)

1) Because it’s the holidays
364 days a year, you practice being good. You eat your diet cereal, opt for fat-free milk and politely decline complimentary cré¨me Brule. (Just kidding “ that would be a crime.) You go for jogs, you count calories and you weep when the scale says you’ve crept up one or two pounds. But for one day (or eight, depending on what you practice), forget all of that. After all, if Santa can eat cookies at millions of people’s houses, you can double scoop your mashed potatoes.

2) Because it’s a novelty
Since when is it common to indulge in a multiple course meal for free without having to lift a finger? That’s right “ it’s not. So if a host is going to the trouble of honing his or her culinary skills on your behalf, you might as well take advantage of the situation and eat everything in sight. What’s the worst that can happen? (We’ll answer that: your breadstick diet is acknowledged only when they ask you to host Christmas next year.)

3) Because it’s socially acceptable
Sure, we know pop culture isn’t always right, but like the great films and TV specials dictate, Christmas is the time to sit back, sip wine and eat turkey to the point of needing stretchy pants. (Or steak “ maybe you’re more into steak.) If you’re one to care what people think, forget it, and help yourself to seconds, thirds, fourths and even fifths (not that I’ve done that without the word pie involved). Then use the strength of your extra calories to stop caring what people think once and for all; channel Liz Lemon and laugh at the fact any naysayers probably missed out on a delicious meal. 

4) Because you do what you want
Aside from the fact that I’m telling you to do something right now (irony alert), who are writers, lifestyle coaches, experts and gurus to say you can’t eat all the mincemeat your little heart desires? It’s the holidays, you’re your own person, and you deserve that side of gravy with your carrots and corn. You work hard, you’re with family and friends “ and on that topic, you may even need the turkey coma to get you through the extended family. Now let’s celebrate these decisions with a nice helping of shortbread and cake.

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Tags: Christmas, Christmas food, drinks, eating, eating what you want, emotional well being, festivus, Holiday, meals, mental health, pie, yuletide

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  1. Avatar
    • Sarah Robinson
    • January 1, 1970
    I hope you thought of me when you were writing about complimentary creme brulee ;)Freakin’ amazing!
  2. Avatar
    • Sarah Robinson
    • January 1, 1970
    I hope you thought of me when you were writing about complimentary creme brulee ;)Freakin’ amazing!

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