April Fools Day is meant to be a celebration of foolishness, a time when you can prey on the gullibility of others and pass it off as a joke. Still, just because it is a completely fake holiday doesn’t mean that it’s just a free-for-all.
While you’re plotting this year’s prank, strike these from your list of options:
Fake Trips to Disneyland
As a child, I once got a phone call from Goofy, telling me that I had just won a trip to Disneyland and that he needed to speak to my mother right away. I was still screaming with joy when my mother called Goofy a bastard and hung up the phone. Good joke, uncle. You really got me.
The only time being pregnant is funny is when Arnold Schwarzenegger is carrying a baby as an experiment in fertility treatments. And the only way that sentence would be funny is if you remember the 1994 comedy “Junior,” which I hope you don’t. It might seem like the ultimate “gotcha!” but there is no way for this joke to end other than with you being single and permanently added to the International Database of Crazy Ex-Girlfriends. And if you were thinking of pulling this on your parents, I don’t know what they could have possibly done to have such a horrible daughter.
My sophomore year, my boyfriend and I thought it would be funny to tell my parents we were engaged, dropping out of our respective colleges and moving back to our hometown to become husband and wife. Hilarious, right? My mother didn’t answer my calls for weeks. WEEKS!
In college, my cousin called her mom at work and said she had gotten hit by a car. For some reason, it’s hard to get a chuckle out of somebody after describing a fictional brush with death.
Other than that, it’s all fair game. Feel free to tell your loved ones and casual acquaintances that you won the lottery, that you found a rabbit in the backseat of your car, that you once met Jonathan Taylor Thomas at a Sbarro Pizza in the mall, that you were born with a tail or that you once caught a fish with your bare hands (all excellent ideas, by the way).
What was your best (or worst) April Fool’s Day prank of all time?