Okay, guys. It’s week four of The Bachelorette Canada. We have some real connections and maybe a real villain. The crew is back in our home and native land for their next round of dates in Montreal. But, as usual, we still have questions.
1. Is Drew actually the worst?
2. Is Chris going to be okay even though he’s not getting a solo date?
3. Do you think Mikhel wants to marry Jasmine solely because she brought him coffee in bed? (I WOULD.)
4. Can I have one of those croissants?
5. Why is there so much on TV right now? I CAN’T WATCH EVERYTHING.
6. Is a toque a part of the street art uniform?
7. But, like, can you really ruin art? (Apparently.)
8. Do you think the date feels awkward when it’s just two of them listening to a live band?
9. Are Mikhel and Jasmine like the sexiest couple ever?
10. How do Jasmine’s abs like that and mine don’t? *Puts down the chips and backs away slowly*
11. How do I get invited on this acrobatic date?
12. Why does David look so visibly uncomfortable?
13. Do you think Chris and Drew will kill each other?
14. Speaking of sports, anyone know the Jays score?
15. Is the plural of apparatus apparatuses or is it apparati?
16. Did we learn nothing from Justin Bieber in the harness?
17. Why have I still not seen Luzia?
18. So I guess I’m not the only person whose glasses bother them when they make out?
19. Why would you want to tone it down?
20. Does Jasmine really care which team wins?
21. But, like, isn’t bringing all the guys a bit of a cop out?
22. Does telling the Bachelor/Bachelorette about the villain ever actually work the way you expect it to?
23. Can we touch Mike’s stomach?
24. What is my dog doing under my bed?
25. Why do the guys always have the most dramaaaaaa?
26. Why didn’t we see more of Kyle this week?
27. Do you think Kevin’s crutch is to get the Wells-level sympathy vote?
28. How much fabric do you think the show had to buy for all that drapery?
29. WHY IS KYLE GOING HOME AND DREW IS STAYING? WHY WHY WHY WHYYYYYYY?
*Sobs uncontrollably* (but, like, not as much as Benoit)
