Last night… on RuPaul’s Drag Race: Does Shania Twain have more personality than a pickle? It depends on the pickle and it depends on the Shania, but when the pickle is Miz Cracker and the Shania is 2018 Shania, we learned last night on Drag Race that the answer is no!
Much like when Charles and Camilla came to Canada to stare blankly at things, Canada’s country queen brought her polite interest to the judging panel as the queens improvised a scene for trash talk-show Bossy Rossy, hosted by Ross Matthews in flaming red Sally Jessy Raphael glasses. The mini-challenge, throwing together drag-army ensembles, went to The Vixen, who chose Asia O’Hara as her partner and also paired the remaining queens up.
On Bossy Rossy, Miz Cracker’s Dr. Dill, a pickle in a lab coat who reveals herself to be a real! life! giant! pickle!, overshadowed Mayhem Miller as a less-than-convincing pickle-phobe. Eureka brought grown-girl confidence to her role as a sexy baby on a segment aptly titled “Look At Me! I’m A Sexy Baby!”
Baby what baba?
Who else is this when you don’t get your way?@eurekaohara #DragRace pic.twitter.com/4Faa6XJMX4— RuPaul’s Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) April 20, 2018
Meanwhile, The Vixen and Asia concocted a shady scheme to take their theme “Why Are You So Obsessed With Me?” and make it a tribute to Cracker’s supposed drag plagiarism of Aquaria. But they forgot to do that, oh!, or any of the rest of their material either.
A “Denim and Diamonds”-themed runway challenge plopped unconvincing pickle-phobe Mayhem and Monet (again!) in the bottom two for a Lipsynch For Your Life to “Man! I Feel Like A Woman” in front of the woman-feeler herself, Shania Twain. Mayhem, dressed as “the Black Judd,” was overshadowed by Monet’s personality which included mimed motorcycle driving, mimed untucking, and IRL double-fisted hairspray-ing. Shania sang along.
In the end, Eureka was declared the winner while wearing a denim jumpsuit in a look she described as “grown ass Honey Booboo done eat the rest of the family.” Monet was spared for another week while Mayhem was sent home.
But questions remain. Does your toddler dress too sexy? Is his mistress’s drag sister the real father? Are we going to award the other queens who showed a distinguished effort this week? Probably, probably, and of course!
Most Likely To Win RuPaul’s Worst Enemies Race: The Vixen
After putting Eureka on blast in Untucked last week, karma has punished The Vixen with the least fabulous catchphrase in Drag Race herstory: “don’t poke the bear.” It sounds like a wood engraving Roseanne’s Dan Conner would hang on his outhouse.
Eureka made amends by explaining that ever since she started doing drag, she has never felt so free to be her true annoying self, a sentiment that Vixen related to as she has been expressing a newfound political outspokenness in such places as everywhere but on this show. The queens ended it with Eureka offering a handshake and The Vixen saying she couldn’t commit to that.
Best Sexy Pickle: Miz Cracker
It takes a special kind of crazy to see a pickle costume hanging in wardrobe and say, “I am her.” Cracker killed it as pickle-phobe specialist Dr. Dill on Bossy Rossy. Her runway look—a pink jumpsuit, outstretched pigtails, and two buckteeth—confirmed it: while everyone else was serving fish, we were filling up on cracker.
How did @Wendys sneak into this competition? 😂 @miz_cracker #DragRace pic.twitter.com/i0ohOOyMvh
— RuPaul’s Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) April 20, 2018
Least Likely Boob Reveal: Aquaria
RuPaul (and Judith Butler) say we’re born naked and the rest is drag. Aquaria argues that you can be naked and a baby while serving drag. She capped her Bossy Rossy sexy baby segment by lifting her bib and flashing the tassles covering her nipples.
Least Likely To Have Boots Under Her Bed: Monique Heart
Monique Heart thought her cow print was perfect for the Denim and Diamonds runway challenge, until she found it was actually giraffe print. Was that okay with Shania? Neigh!
Did you stone those boots? @IAmMoniqueHeart #DragRace pic.twitter.com/s4lJ8fnnfg
— RuPaul’s Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) April 20, 2018
Least Likely Gay To Keep A Straight Face: The Vixen
You know how the funniest thing that ever happens on Saturday Night Live is when they break out laughing? Apparently that is a huge taboo and SNL producer Lorne Michaels hates it when Leslie Jones anyone does that. Which is all to say that The Vixen is never going to be on Saturday Night Live because she could barely contain her hysterics around Ross Matthews (but, also, same).
Next week, on RuPaul’s Drag Race?: Queens form their own groups to appear on Drag-Con panels. The Oscar-nominated writers of The Big Sick Emily V. Gordon and Kumail Nanjiani guest judge, because it’s gotta still be awards season somewhere, right?
Will Eureka still get chosen last, even though she explained she has a perfectly good reason for why no one can stand her? Will Sally Jessy Raphael call Ross Matthews to say, “Bitch stole my look”? Will Monique remember to milk the giraffes?
Find out on episode six of RuPaul’s Drag Race: Season 10 on Thursday at 8 PM E/P on OUTtv.
Pun game, so strong rn. #DragRace pic.twitter.com/GrCGJ9gatc
— RuPaul’s Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) April 20, 2018
