Here is a fact I truly believe: celebrities owe us nothing.
I mean, really. For the most part, they are actors or musicians. All they have to do is show up to work, do the work (hopefully well), and then go home. They don’t owe us details of their personal lives, glimpses into their relationships, or explanations behind whatever-the-hell decisions they happen to be making. It’d be super great if they used their platforms for social and political causes that matter, but they don’t technically have to do that. They are act-ors. Sing-ers. Etc. They don’t technically need to do anything more.
But a lot of them do, and that’s super awesome. Enter: Kristen Stewart, who began opening up about her own personal life when she began dating women (currently, she’s dating Alicia Cargile). And in a recent interview with T Magazine, she explained why.
“I would never talk about my relationships before, but once I started dating girls it seemed like there was an opportunity to represent something really positive,” she explained. “I still want to protect my personal life, but I don’t want to seem like I’m protecting the idea, so that does sort of feel like I owe something to people.”
“It’s not that I want to hide who I am or anything I’m doing in my life,” she continued. “It’s that I don’t want to become a part of a story for entertainment value.”
Which is totally reasonable — especially after the gong show that was her former relationship with Robert Pattinson (that we will never, ever forget, even if we are desperate to). But also, I get what K-Stew’s saying: if she were to hide her relationship now, that would seem like she was hiding the fact that she’s queer. (Even though this isn’t the case.) So by being out and being herself and living her life, she’s making the fact that she’s queer less of A Thing. Because it shouldn’t be a thing. Kristen Stewart — and any person — should get to date whoever they want because it is 2016 and it’s embarrassing to define a person by their sexuality. (Also: super demeaning.) But also, let’s remind ourselves that no person owes us any more than what they want to give us. If Stewart wants to talk about Alicia, that’s rad and let’s hear it and let’s cheer this relationship on. But if she doesn’t, that’s okay too and we can just step back and let them live.
In short, celebrities owe us only what they choose to give us. And it’s awesome that Kristen Stewart wants to disclose anything, but we don’t get to dictate the terms on which she decides.
